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The Songs & Lyrics of Mel Brooks

This page is dedicated to the musical talents of Mel Brooks and contains lyrics to songs from Mel's movies, shows & live apperances. In most cases these lyrics were transcribed by the webmaster, so if there are errors, please send corrections. Clips are no longer provided... but references to where you can obtain or listen to these is available... of course you can always search youtube and other services to see if they are on-line.

An Audience with Mel Brooks (1983)

The Producers on Broadway

The Producers Movie

Blazing Saddles

High Anxiety

To Be Or Not To Be

The History of The World Part I

Svitati (aka Screwloose)



Opening Number (0:30)

Lyrics by Mel Brooks
Performed by Mel Brooks in "An Audience with Mel Brooks"
    Available on
  • An Audience with Mel Brooks (VHS)
  • The Incredible Mel Brooks (DVD Set Disc 4)
Here I am, I'm Melvin Brooks
			I've come to stop the show
			Just a ham
			who's minus looks
			But in your hearts I'll grow
			I'll tell you gags,
			I'll sing you songs,
			____ little
			____ little
			____ roll along
			I'm out of my mind,
			So won't you be kind,
			And please love,
			Melvin Brooks
			

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Moonlight Becomes You (2:30)

Lyrics by Bing Crosby
Performed by Mel Brooks in "An Audience with Mel Brooks"
    Available on
  • An Audience with Mel Brooks (VHS)
  • The Incredible Mel Brooks (DVD Set Disc 4)

Moonlight becomes you, it goes with your hair
You certainly know the right things to wear
Moonlight becomes you, I'm thrilled at the sight
And I could get so romantic tonight

You're all dressed up to go dreaming
Hey don't tell me I'm wrong
Oh what a night to go dreaming
Mind if I tag along

If I say I love you
I want you to know
It's not just because there's moonlight
Although, moonlight becomes you so

------ instrumental break ------

Harry, Harry, Harry you came here tonight...
Harry, Harry, I'm sorry, you're not Harry

What a wonderful audience, I'm so glad you came, this is terrific

I'm sorry madam, you're too old, you'll have to go
You're too old, so get the hell outta here!
Sit down, sit down, I was just kidding. I am kind.
You're only here by a thread, you're old too


You're all dressed up to go dreaming
Don't tell me I'm wrong
And what a night to go dreaming
Mind if I tag along

Key Change!

If I say I love you
I want you to know
It's not just because there's moonlight
Although, moonlight becomes you so

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Retreat (4:28)

Lyrics by Mel Brooks and Ronnie Graham
Performed by Mel Brooks & Ronnie Graham in "An Audience with Mel Brooks"
    Available on
  • An Audience with Mel Brooks (VHS)
  • The Incredible Mel Brooks (DVD Set Disc 4)
It's called retreat. It is an ode to cowardice.
			We would like to do... Ronnie get to the piano.
			We would like to do retreat for you.
			Ronnie is a wonderful guy, I don't care what they say.
			
			our eyes are gone, along with our eyes.
			
			Alzheimers, alzheimers, 
						
			An officer of France am I,
			My rank is general,
			And if you ask me how I feel,
			I'll tell you I feel mal
			
			[mal-tep]
			
			nah.
			
			[mal-de-mer?]
			
			nah.
			
			[mal-de-what?]
			
			Mal de gail.
			
			I'm sick of war for many reasons,
			Three of them will do,			
			It's 1815, 
			I am French,
			And this is Waterloo
			
			To arms, soldiers of France,
			Lift up your lance, pick up your pants,
			The battles begun
			
			To arms, heroes of Gaul
			This is not ___,
			Get on the ___,
			The battles beugn
			
			The enemy is advancing,
			With murder in his eye,
			Our way I think he's glancing,
			For us it's do or die
			
			I don't mind the DO part.
			But DIE? 
			Why?
			
			Listen folks, I have a very good idea
			
			Retreat, retreat,
			Drop your swords, run
			Our foe is nere, 
			Our choice is clear,
			Get out of here,
			Horray for fear,
			We're done, 
			Runaway, runaway,
			If you runaway you live to runaway another day
						
			Retreat, retreat,
			Give your feet a chance,
			I've got good news for all of yous
			We ____, 
			For France,			
			Be discrete, and retreat
			
			Show me a man, with deep red blood in veins,		
			If he's got brains, he'll keep that blood in his veins,
			
			Show me a man, who doesn't know the meaning of fear
			Show me a horse, and I'll disappear,
			
			Show me a man who loves the smell of a fight
			Show me a man who ___ the coward in flight
			
			Show me a man, who loves the feel of steel in his gut
			Show me that man, I'll show you a nut
			
			What am I saying.
			What am I talking.
			What am I doing.
			How can I talk like this.
			
			How can I forget,
			My La Belle,
			
			France
			
			Children, playing hide and seek besides the little Seinne
			Ah 
			Children, dentists pulling out French teeth with very little pain
			Ah
			
			Every night I dream of La Belle
			France
			Take my la ____
			But don't take France
						
			For her glory I would die
			I would cheat and run and  spy
			But I'll be damned if I'm gonna die
			
			For La Belle
			France
			
			Here they come, they're breaking through,
			what'll we do, what'll do we do
			
			Retreat, retreat,
			Give your feet a chance
			I've got good news for all of yous
			We've got to lose
			For France, face defeat,
			Be discrete, 
			This is eet[it], Time to queet [quit], back with eet [it]
			
			And retreaaaaaaaaaat!

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Sweet Georgie Brown (1:56)

Lyrics by Bing Crosby
Performed by Mel Brooks in "To Be Or Not To Be" & "An Audience with Mel Brooks"
    Available on
  • To Be Or Not To Be (VHS, DVD, Blu-Ray)
  • An Audience with Mel Brooks (VHS)
  • The Incredible Mel Brooks (DVD Set Disc 4)
I Want To Be A Producer (Live on Rosie)
Mel Brooks/Matthew Broderick/Cast of the Producers (4:27) - 4 MB
Hear It!
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King Of Old Broadway (Live on Letterman)
Mel Brooks/Nathan Lane/Cast of the Producers (4:57) - 4.54 MB
Hear It!
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Blazing Saddles Theme Song
Mel Brooks/John Morris/Frankie Laine (2:15) - 927 KB
Hear It!
He wore a blazing saddle,
he wore a shinning star,
his job to offer battle,
to bad men near and far,
he conquered fear,
he conquered hate,
he turned dark night into day,
he made his blazing saddle,
a torch to light the way...

When outlaws ruled the west,
and fear filled the land,
a cry went up for a man with guts,
to take the west in hand,
they needed a man who was brave and true,
with justice for all as his aim,
when out of the sun,
rode a man with a gun,
and Bart was his name,
yes Bart was his name...

He wore a blazing saddle,
he wore a shinning star,
his job to offer battle,
to bad men near and far,
he conquered fear,
he conquered hate,
he turned dark night into day,
he made his blazing saddle,
a torch to light the way...

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Springtime for Hitler
Mel Brooks (3:24) - 1,365 KB
Hear It!
Germany was having trouble,
What a sad, sad story.
Needed a new leader to restore its former glory.
Where, oh, where was he,
Who could that man be,
We looked around,
And then we found,
The man for you and me,
And now it's

Springtime for Hitler and Germany,
Deustchland is happy and gay,
We're marching to a faster pace,
Look out here comes the master race

Springtime for Hitler and Germany,
Winter for Poland and France,
Springtime for Hitler and Germany,
Come on Germans go into your dance

I was born in Deusseldorf,
And that is why they call me Rolph

(voice of Mel Brooks)
Don't be stupid,
Be a smarty,
Come and join the Nazi party

Springtime for Hitler and Germany
(2 bullets fired)
Goose step's the new step today
(Enemy Fire)
Bombs falling from the skies again,
(Bomb sounds)
Deutschland is on the rise again,
Springtime for Hitler and Germany,
U-boats are sailing once more,
Springtime for Hitler and Germany,
Means that soon we'll be going,
We've got to be going,
You know we'll be going to war!

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Prisoners of Love
Mel Brooks (2:20) - 965 KB
Hear It!
Prisoners of love,
blue skies above,
can't keep our hearts in jail,

Prisoners of love
No, no, no! Now come on guys let's put a little life in it!
You now own 20 percent of prisoners of love... congratulations
Yes sir
You now own 30 percent of prisoners of love... congratulations
Yes sir
The warden would like to make a little investment in your production...
Uh... tell him he owns 50 percent of the show
Thanks
My Pleasure
Sing it out men, we open in Levinworth on Saturday night!

Prisoner's of love,
blue skies above,
can't keep our hearts in jail,
prisoners of love,
our turtle doves,
soon comin round with nails,

Oh you can lock us up and lose the key,
but hearts of love are always free,
prisoner's of love,
blue skies above,
'cause we're still prisoner's of love,
oh you can lock us up and lose the key,
but hearts of love will always be,
prisoner's of love,
blue skies above,
'cause we're prisoner's,
we're prisoner's,
we're prisoner's of love...

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I'm Tired (corrections by Amanda)

Mel Brooks/Madeline Kahn (4:29) - 1,847 KB
Hear It!
Here I stand, the goddess of Desire,
set men on fire,
I have this power,
morning noon and night it's drink and dancing,
some quick romancing,
and then a shower,
stage door johnnies constantly surround me,
they always hound me,
with one request,
who can satisfy their lustful habits,
I'm not a rabbit!
I need some rest!

I'm tired,
sick and tired of love,
I've had my fill of love,
from below and above,
tired,
tired of being admired,
tired of love uninspired,
let's face it,
I'm tired!

I've been with 1000's of men,
again and again,
they promise the moon,
they always coming and going,
and going and coming,
and always too soon!
Right girls?

I'm tired,
tired of playing the game,
ain't it a crying shame?
I'm so tired,
God dammit I'm exhausted!

Hello cowboy, what's your name?
Tex 'mam
Tex 'mam ? Tell me Tex'mam, are you in show business?
Nopr
We'll then why don't you get your freaking feet off here
La ha
Ah ha he hu...
Hello handsome, is that a 10 gallon hat? Or are you just enjoying the show?
Ah ha ah...

(Cowboy)
Oh miss lilly, oh my lovely baby,
oh my pussy cat, ah ha ha ha ho ho,
put it there baby, put it... ohhhhh

I'm tired,
tired of playing the game,
ain't it a crying shame,
I'm so tired

(soldiers, sounds kinda like Mel Brooks... but is it?)
she's tired
    -she's tired
sick and tired of love
    -give her a break
she's had her fill of love
    -she's not a snake
from bellow and above
    -can't you see she's sick?
tired
    -she's bushed
tired of being admired
    -let her alone
tired of love uninspired
    -get off the phone
she's tired
    -don't you know she's pooped?

I've been with 1000's of men,
again and again,
they sing the same toon,
they start with Byron and Shelly,
then jump on your belly,
and bust your ballon!
aye!
tired,
tired of playing the game,
ain't it a freakin shame,
I'm so...
let's face it,
everything below the waste is kapput!

(Soldiers)
Tired!
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If You Love Me Baby, Tell Me Loud
Mel Brooks (1:33) - 625 KB
Hear It!
If you love me baby tell me loud!
If you love me baby tell me loud!
If you love me baby tell me loud!
Loud, loud, loud, loud

(chorus)
Loud,loud,loud,loud

Don't whisper sweet nothings in my ear,
If you love me tell me loud and clear!

If you love me baby tell me loud!
If you love me baby tell me loud!
If you love me baby tell me loud!

(Kickin' Guitar Solo)

If you love me baby tell me loud!
If you love me baby tell me loud!
If you love me baby tell me loud!
Loud, loud, loud, loud

(chorus)
Loud,loud,loud,loud

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Love Power

Mel Brooks (2:53) - 3392 KB
Hear It!
I would like to uh sing this song,
It's about love, and hate,
Psychidelically speaking,
I'm talking about the power,

Love power,
I'm talking about, love power,
The power of the, sweet flower,
Is gonna rule the earth,
And the (??????? ???)

Love is the flower that is fine,
When I'm walking with my darling,
And we're holding hands,
And life is fine,
'Cause we understand

Walking down the sunny street,
Giving pretty flowers,
To the people, that we meet

And I give a flower to the big fat cop,
He takes his club and he beats me up,
I give a flower to the garbage man
He stuffs my girl in the garbage can
And I give it to the land lord when the rent come round
He throws it in a toilet and he flush it down
It goes into the sewer with the yuck a running through it
And it runs into the river that we drink
Hey worldyou stink, uh , uh
Man it's later than you think

Girl you just got one more chance,
Come on baby while I dance,

Love, lover power,
I'm talking about, lover power,
The power of, a little flower,
You don't think about no littler flower,
Oh no, all you think about is guns
If everybody in the world today had a flower instead of a gun,
There would be no wars,
There would be one big smelling,
Just the flowers,

Hey man,
My flower,
What did you do to my flower man?
You hurt it, like everything else
Everything else, the flower
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The French Mistake
Mel Brooks (:31) - 195 KB
Hear It!
Throw out your hands,
stick out your tush,
hands on your hips,
give 'em a push,
you'll be surprised,
you're doing the French Mistake!

Come on try it move those feet along,
15 million french men can't be wrong,
weeee

Throw out your hands,
stick out your tush,
hands on your hips,
give 'em a push,
you'll be surprised,
you're doing the French Mistake,
Voila!

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The Inquisition

Mel Brooks (8:14) - 3,864 KB
Hear it!
(Corrections Thanks to Erin)
The year was 1489, the black plague ravaged the continent. It was the hour of the infamous auto dufeat where for public amusement heretics and non believers were tortured and burned in a carnival like atmosphere. And it was guided by the most fearful spector, to sit in judgement over good and evil, the grand inquisitor, Torquemada.

All pay heed, now enters his holiness, Torquemada, the grand Inquisitor of the Spanish Inquisition
Torquemada, do not implore him for compassion,
Torquemada, do not beg him for forgiveness,
Torquemada, do not ask him for mercy,
Let's face it, you can't talk em out of anything

Let all those who wish to confess their evil ways
And to except and embrace the true church,
Convert now or forever burn in hell,
For now begins the Inquisition,
The Inquistion, let's begin,
The Inquistion, look out sin,
We have our mission to convert the Jews

Je, Je, Je, Je, Je, Jews...
We're going to teach them, wrong from right
We're going to help them, see the light
And make and offer they they can't refuse,
That the Jews just can't refuse
Confess, don't be boring
Say yes, say yes, don't be dull
A fact, you're ignoring,
it's better to lose your skull cap than your skull, oy oy gevalt
The Inquistion, what a show,
The Inquisition, here we go,
We know you're wishing that we go away
But the Inquisition is here and it's here to stay
The Inquisition, oh the fun,
The Inquisition, what a joy,
The Inquisition, oy oy oy

I was sitting in a temple,
I was minding my own business,
I was listening to a lovely Hebrew mass,
Then these papist persons plunge in,
Aand they throw me in the dungeon,
And they shove a red hot poker up my ass,
Is that considerate? Is that polite?
And not a tube of preparation H in sight!

I'm sittin flickin chickens,
And I'm looking through the pickens,
And suddenly these goys break down my walls,
I didn't even know them,
And they grabbed me by the scrotum,
And started playing ping pong with my balls,
Oy the agony, oh the shame,
To make my privates public? for a game?

The Inquisitions, what a show,
The Inquistions, here we go,
We know you're wishing that we go away
But the Inquisition's here and it's here to
Hey Torquemada, whatta ya say?
I just got back from the auto-da-fe
Auto-de-fe, what's an auto-de-fe*?
It's what you oughten't to do, but you do anyway,

Skit and skat and voodley vat and toodle de day
Will you convert? No, no , no, no
Will you confess? No, no, no, no
Will you revert? No, no, no, no
Will you say yes? No, no, no, no
Now I ask in a nice way, I've said pretty please,
I've bent their ears, now I'll work on their knees

Hey Torquemada, walk this way,
We gotta a little game that you might want to play,
So pull that handle, try your luck,
Who knows Torq, you might win a buck
Alright,

Put it in the car, in the car
How we doin' any converts today?
Not a one, nay, nay, nay
We've flattened their fingers,
We've branded their buns,
Nothing is working,
Send in the nuns,

(instrumental)

Oi,

The Inquisition, what a show,
The Inquisition, here we go,
We know you're wishing, that we go away
So come you muslims and you jews,
we got good news for all of yous,
You better change your point of views, today,
'Cause the Inquisition's here,
and it's here to stay...

* from the Portugese "active of faith"

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High Anxiety
Mel Brooks (2:31) - 1036 KB
Hear It!
High Anxiety
Whenever you're near
High Anxiety
It's you that I fear

My heat's afraid to fly
It's crashed before
But then you take my hand
My heart starts to soar

Once more

High Anxiety
It's always the same
High Anxiety
It's you that I blame

It's very clear to me
I've to give in
High Anxiety
You win

Instrumental(missing dialogue)
Where you from, soldier?
Cincinnati
Nice town. Great Ball club. (tapping man's belly). Ease up on the linguini.

Hello, young lovers, whoever you are... (picking a grain of rice off new groom's jacket)
Just married?
This morning
...and they said it wouldn't last

But then you take my hand
My heart starts to soar
Once more

Key Change!

High Anxiety
It's always the same
High Anxiety
It's you that I blame

It's very clear to me
I've to give in
High Anxiety

And remember folks
Be good to your parents
They've been good to you

You win
The Hitler Rap

Mel Brooks (4:26) - 4,168 KB
Hear It!
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It's Good To Be The King Rap
Mel Brooks (7:14) - 6,801 KB
Hear It!
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Goodbye Tootise Goodbye
Mel Brooks (1:13) - 1,157 KB
Hear It!
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